Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Describe yourself: Mr. Brightside
How do you feel: Under the Gun
My soul's present condition: Human
My motto: Smile like you mean it
Your fear: All The Pretty face
Describe where you currently live: I Can’t Stay
If you could go anywhere, where would you go: Space/Spaceman
Your favourite form of transportation: Wait
Your best friend is(are): Jenny Was a Friend of Mine
What is the best advice you have to give: Change Your Mind
Thought for the Day: Everything Will Be All Right
How I would like to die: On Top xD
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Who’s to blame for the F?
After the exam week, the Psychology society was abuzz by the students, specifically the Juniors – complaining, making alibis, justifications, denial, and etc. The midterms, for them, was just like the bagyong Ondoy – mentally and physically devastating; and the aftermath? Aside from disappointment, they elicit their enervating locus of control.
There are chismis that had been crisscrossing from student circles that are like the Kalaw’s – group-oriented birds that really sound infuriating especially during noon. That is because, some third year students, during their breaks, they seem to talk about how meager they perform in midterms because of something that is beyond their control.
Not to offend anyone, but most of the avowals I’ve overheard sounded like: “Si Ma’am/Sir man gud kai (insert word), maong bagsak ko,” “wa man ko katarong study ato Bai kay busy kaayo,” “ako mabagsak? (F gyud biya),” “wa man pud ko resources gud.” “Naa plano si God nganong ingon ani and result.” And there are lots of lines akin to those that I failed to mention.
From those statements, the only thing that rings a bell is the fact that they are using different social strategies to feel better—not to get insecure with others, or not to look like a lame duck amongst their peer.
Worst, there are some students who settle on their poor performance. They believe that a clinging grade, or F on a difficult subject, is the utmost of their capacity. But wait! Nobody relishes from a grade of F or D, right? So they simply put the blame on everything that they think is out of their hands.
Also, it is clear that they are making alibis, excuses, justifications, denial, and laying the blame on others. And if an individual keeps on doing those, rest assured that they will not see core of the problem – their faulty cognitions that are often manifested on their speech. Moreover, the practice of manufacturing reasons would also make one believe that failure, especially if it becomes a self-norm, is acceptable. It is undoubtedly a hoax directed to no other than, their selves!
In short, they tend to QUIT! And thus, they hamper their potentials that had been dormant due to their destructive mentality. Note that quitting would just make everything grave. But then, for those who are externally-bound, it is the best solution to things that seem to be spinning out of control. It becomes a habit for them and they end up with nothing.
Generally the locus of control they demonstrate are externally focused, to the point where it becomes debilitating. And it’s just like a sailor sailing on an open sea, and amid the whirling waters, he dismisses to use the paddle situated right under his nose. More's the pity; they are letting bad fate and misfortune shore them to the “isle of anxiety.” And as a result, they tend to become more handicapped than ever.
Not only that it causes one to feel helpless, but it also makes one insecure and inferior in making decisions. When it comes to life-changing decisions, they also tend to be dependent on other people.
I am not saying that external factors do not affect us. But again, the effect of these things on us should be limited. We shouldn’t really let them take control of our lives. Rather we need to become responsible over our decisions. Whatever the outcomes are, we should understand that our choices are behind each and every one of these outcomes. In other words then, we must see to it that we are the captains of our ships. By being so, when we find our ships off-course and battling a maelstrom, we can easily turn towards a different direction. Thus, we also come to understand that we are free to create the lives we want to live and the future that we have set our eyes upon.
I think I am getting my point across, or at least I hope I am anyway. I do not exactly know how to cut this article short but rather than allowing myself to become circumlocutory, I’ll just end with this statement, “Remember that each day you live is tantamount to writing a page in your life story. Life is short, make your own decisions and make the most of it.”
Friday, August 27, 2010
And once again, I am caught helpless
Delicate like a butterfly wing;
Lively as it seems
Trapped between boundaries after boundaries;
Like the gates of heaven and hell
Will I cross the line? Love to, but for now, no!
Do you want me to cross that line? And that I do not know.
In my fantasies you reside
Like heaven and earth collide
And when the clouds are gone
I see the sky so close like my sister
So clear like water
So gorgeous like the lady in the “Gone with the Wind” teaser
And yet, so far like a dream.
And like a shooting star
I am Wishing, Falling………, hoping that one day
I’ll have the guts to say I love you
followed by you saying, “YES”.
Like a sugar-free expresso
You remained intense
I never knew madness like this
I never knew love like this
Bitter and yet I call for another
But if you will break the doors of heaven
I will surely sing with the angels
I’ll pull the guitar strings for God creating a rock ‘n roll rhythm that would make us all, head-bang.
And if Angel Gabriel would kick us out and send us back to hell ‘coz you’re so hot and I sang out of tune;
I’ll tear down the gates of hell and lock myself with Lucifer so you wouldn’t have to.
Friend (or Insert name), if falling in love with you is a crime;
Then I plead myself guilty as charged.
Monday, August 23, 2010
The standoff between the policeman and the hostage taker ex-Police officer Rolando Mendoza, had displayed the capacity of our commando’s to address a hostage crisis. The situation lasted from more or less twelve hours – from 9:00AM to 9:00PM.
Also it is an acid test on the competency of our local police; to address those types of situations either through antagonistic approach, or through a peaceful negotiation.
In addition, the situation is tougher since it involves a well-trained police official who was demanding to be reinstated in the service. Also, the ex-Police was reportedly armed with an M16 rifle and a short service firearm.
Following the news, I was able to notice some lapses on the side of the Police. Although it is somehow subjective, it may cause others to ponder about the hostage situation. Even though I’ve turned on the television starting 7PM, I was able to have a picture of the whole story. And I believe that the situation could have been apprehended through a peaceful negotiation.
Studying the case, the hostage taker, I believe, was not insane. I stand that he was trying to make a scene to lobby his demands. The fact that earlier he released some of the hostages shows that killing and suicide is not his primary goal. Also, it elicits that he is just using the hostages to have a bargaining power.
Next, the scene about the brother of the hostage taker tends to aggravate the situation. The emotions involve somehow triggers insanity on Rolando’s side. Note that after seeing what the police did to his brother, assuming that the bus has a television, he threatened to kill some of the hostages; and so he did.
The presence of Rolando’s brother was a vital key to end the situation. Note that in a hostage situation, being the hostage taker, you know that you don’t stand a chance against the Police. And the best thing that you could have is a negotiation, or else, you kill and die.
Therefore, his brother who was also apprehended by the police could have been a vehicle for a negotiation. Note that there is a tight emotional connection between both of them; it is clear by the way on how the hostage taker reacted to what the police had done to his brother – he started the killing of the hostages.
Also, Rolando has a family that he could seek refuge on situations that he feels helpless; situations like him being a hostage taker. If dealt perfectly, his family is the most effective negotiator on the situation. And if he is not in his proper mind, maybe an over-the-phone counseling session might help.
Rolando do not want to die! But he is ready for it. If I am Rolando, why bother releasing those Chinese tourists if my point of detaining them is to kill myself, or get killed after killing them.
Lastly, the hostile approach is an incompatible solution to the situation. I think that they, the Police, used coercion too early. As a result, a bloody ending ended the life story of a Police official who is a victim an ill political system.
Note: Yes nalang mo ha. Hehehehe
Saturday, August 21, 2010
by: Anjo J Bacarisas
Complaining is one way of a person to release feelings that causes anxiety. When an individual has a resentment on something; complaining, I think, is the most automatic and easily done negative expression of how a person feels towards something.
Based on my record, I have done more or less 60 to 80 complaints in the entire duration of the activity. Although there are times that I was conscious that I am not supposed to make a complaint, but it seems like the urge to make one cannot be defied. In line to it, most of my complaints are automatic (can I consider it as part of my personality? Or behavior?).
On my observation, every time I throw a complaint, a negative thing always follows. For instance, I blab to my cousins about what they have done to my room. Although words that came out are not that relevant to the mess, but then I was overwhelmed by my emotions. As a result, they all go out of my room and I became isolated for a moment. See? Negative ang results.aw. And I believe that complaining would result to something that is more undesirable than what you are complaining with. And you sure get to hurt other people’s feelings.
On the brighter side, a complaint is a way to show that you dislike, feel unease, mad, or uncontended of something. By then, the receiver of your complaint will have the idea of what you want and what you do not want. It is somehow normal since it is part of us as social animals.
On the contrary, there are a lot of ways to express your discontent, madness, and the like of it. In fact, I’ve learned from the activity that you have the power to control your MOUTH from complaining. So the paragraph above this is not a good excuse! And I was able to rationalize that if your goal is to bring change that is beneficial to you and the people around you, then complaining is not a good vehicle for such. (Change = for other people not to commit again those things that causes you to complain).
Also, from the activity, I was able to differentiate complaint from a feedback. I think that a complaint is somewhat involves emotions and unlikely feelings and is therefore destructive. Feedback on the other hand is a positive reaction and is constructive for any individuals. Therefore complaints are feedbacks; the only differences are the emotions that are attached to it and how it is delivered.
Lastly, complaining only elicits that you have an external locus of control. And although I’m not sure about this but most of the complaints that I’ve heard are geared towards blaming others in bringing in unlikely situations.
Monday, August 16, 2010
“It is because I’m an extrovert”
“Although it’s poor but that is all that I’m capable of”
“The situation does not permit”
“It’s because I’m addicted to it”
“I can’t help it”
Denial, Lies, Alibies, and Justifications! These are the most common things that a person employs every time that what they believe was a misfortune get into their lives. They put the blame on the external factors; they believe that they have no control over their lives; they settle to a poor performance and say that: that is all that I can do. (They’re so external locus of control)
There are even some who blamed God on everything that is happening in their lives. That is because the scripture tells them that everything is according to God’s WILL! Well, they may have misunderstood what it really meant.
In addition, the use of alibies and the like is a submission to your limitations. It is like resolving yourself that you have no control over your decisions and all the things that is happening around you. From that orientation, the feeling of having no choice at all times, in the future, may “contaminate your cerebral fluids” with those ideas. Also, there is a great chance that you’ll develop inferiority when it comes to making decisions. Worst, you’ll be dependent on other people in making decisions for yourself.
To make everything grave, they QUIT! This would be anybody’s last resort when they think that everything seems to be out of control. Note that if QUITTING is your habit, then you’ll surely end up having nothing in the end. And when you realize that you have nothing, anxiety strikes. Well, let’s just hope that you could use that anxiety to advance, or seek for advancement – existential anxiety.
It is non-debatable that external factors do affect us. But again, it should not be controlling our lives. A person must take the responsibility over his decisions. Whatever the outcome is, an individual must have understood that his or her decision is the one that is behind what is happening. In other words, he must see that he is the captain of his ship.
From that, regardless of the outcome, an individual develops the understanding that he has a choice; that he has a freedom to choose; and that he is making his own way on what kind of life he wants to live in the future.
To cut it short, I really do not know how to cut this article short. Well, again it’s on how you want to make an ending on everything. It’s your life story that YOU (they?) are creating. Life is short, and so as this article.